Only Time Will Tell 岁月无敌

Only Time Will Tell

So many writers, composers, and musicians ponder about time. Frequently we encounter a title like this, Only Time (Enya), Only Time Will Tell (Mike Oldfield), Invincible Time (a story by Zhang Xinxin), and so on and so forth.

I am only in my thirties,  a little bit too early to talk about this, especially before my work superiors and bosses and be-spectacled professors and editors.

But it won’t hurt to say a few words.

Even in my own life, this short rule applies: Only time will tell.

Please take notice that I exhibit no ill intention while writing this short piece. I only want to narrative some snippets about what has happened in my life.

Time will tell whether a love will stay. Sometimes it flies away slowly.

Time will tell who is right in his or her judgment. I have loved a few, some ordinarily, some even traumatically. One way or another, the ordinary one disappeared with time, not that painfully.

The traumatic one has kept on lingering and lingering. I had thought I never would able to overcome or heal from it. Time and writing came to my rescue. Gradually it lessened.

My feet used to take me to an office that my head told me not to go to. But you were not your own owner under that circumstances.

One day I just left. I took one step away.

Then I found my feet no longer took me to that office again.

My feet might take me to a better place.

Only time will tell whether a love is genuine.

I have a best friend. I can afford not to contact her for an entire year, since both she and I could be very busy. But I can always count on her being there whenever I have things to tell her. She can also count on me whenever she needs a bailout ocassionally.

Only time will tell whether friendships last. I have kept her for well over twenty years. Maybe she has also kept me for well over 20 years.

I could even sometimes make her angry. But she will be there.

Only time will tell you whether someone is always there. I am talking about love. My findings surprise even myself.

If there is someone you feel you can trust one hundred percent, that is a pretty good sign.

Mm, I haven’t contacted the one for eight long years! How could I know I can entrust what I consider the most precious to me to that person, without having contact with him or her for eight years!

Things change so fast. What is true one day will suddenly change to the opposite the next.

We get to understand lots of things through writing. Writing for me is one way for me to think through things, even if sometimes what I write does not make obvious sense to me.

One day I tell somebody I think I have loved them, even more than I loved myself.

After a few years, I came back to write about it again, to my surprise I have found opposite answers: There is the possibility that they have been playing with my emotions from the very start. Only they considered themselves very good actors, thinking that perhaps they could fool me and others who are not looking very carefully.

Only time will tell.

I had thought I had been just an average student while doing my Master’s at Beijing. However, after a few years, I have suddenly turned into an excellent phd student, no matter how complicated the situation may look like.

Only time will tell. Maybe I did not exert myself that much while studying for my phd. The pressure was very high then, from many angles.

Have I made you proud, the people that I once had worked with or studied with?

I have never consciously had the desire to impress. If I had thought about that, I would have worked myself to death more severely than what I had worked myself to death for.

But if anyone asks me, I will tell I no longer have the desire to pursue another degree, be it Master’s or Doctoral’s.

As I have told in my online videos, lots of things we learn, we learn on ourselves, in our life. Nobody can tell you all the things you need to know.

A love stays. Cherish it. Sometimes some things will have to go, let it go. I have let go so many things, such as the furniture.

I can let go lots of other things that others willingly spend half a lifetime preparing to get, for instance a Green card, or even a citizenship.

Only time will tell. Only time will tell whether you are happy at a place or another.

Look within your heart. Only you yourself know what you want.

I have never thought about such life possibilities. Maybe other people are also using time to see how certain things will develop.

Somethings slip away through your fingers. Somethings remain. Somethings change unbearably.

Will something achieve sublimity?

Will I have a fulfilled life? I think I will. Make your choices carefully and wisely. Take your steps carefully.

The old phrase says: Look before you jump.

I almost jumped off a cliff, if I had not been careful. You know it is not easy to really get to know certain situations or sometimes certain people very well. Most of the times I rely on how I feel.

If you feel uneasy about certain persons or situations, it is not bad to stop for a while and look and feel.

Sooner or later some signs will show up to give you clues on how to handle them.

Only this time-tested phrase: Only Time Will Tell.


我并没有像大多数博士生那样,把论文献给自己的丈夫,妻子/夫人,父母,或朋友,师长,孩子, 甚至于最爱。

这些都可能离开。只有时间不会离开。 只有时间才能检验一切啊。


All Rights Reserved. Xianfeng Mou 1.11.2011


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