Where Do I Place My Confidence

I think I have more confidence in the majority of Americans than I would do with the majority of the Chinese on American soil.

At least Americans believe in making your own life and in your inner strength.

Occasionally you meet some real nasty people. Some Chinese, Some American. Of course also those from other cultural backgrounds. Here you can meet anybody from any culture background.

I once met a Russian woman in her forties. She is the nicest woman I have ever met. I myself is already considered too naive. Decent people would use the word “innocent,” while nasty scum bags would use such words as “ignorant or darn stupid” to describe me. Still some use words such as “mysterious” since they are frustrated at not knowing where to place me, or pigeonhole me. I do not exactly fit in preset patterns.

I am just the way I am. It is because I do not put up so many masks that many who are used to masks are at a loss.

The Russian lady was teaching the language. A Japanese friend brought me over to her place. To my surprise, she tells everything about herself the first time we met.

Maybe she is very familiar with the Japanese friend. And the Japanese friend has been with me for a while. So she opened up.

Because of my recent experience, I only accidentally put down my guard that some scum bag brought me tremendous damage. That women turned out to be a mad dog in a sheep’s disguise. She bites everybody and spreads rabies everywhere. I have said enough about the mad dog.

Later on I indicated concern to the Japanese friend. I worry those with ill intentions, especially men, will take advantage of her too easily. She is too nice. Sure enough, she has to go for professional help.

The world is a nasty place. I am extremely careful, but still I suffered. A person like her would face even more difficulties.

Some places are dangerous. I do not go to those places. That Japanese friend once worried I was abducted while we were away on a conference. Metaphorically, she is not very wrong.

I must learn from her.


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